I was at one of my nephews birthday party’s today, and I was speaking to a few of the girls there and I left feeling a deep sadness at what I experienced. Along with the laughs that were shared, for a few of the women there who have just had a baby (some even just having their 3rd!), i was deeply saddened by when I said ‘you are amazing, your baby is beautiful etc” the first thing they said was “No i’m not beautiful. I hate my body, i’m not beautiful any longer and I feel awful”. I’m not a mother and I don’t understand that side of things, but from having eating dis-orders and body-image issues the majority of my life, I do understand the concept of being at war with your body. I was so sad that it is so easy for a lot of women (and men too!), to so quickly give up on themselves and not realise their own worth, beauty and value – BEYOND the physical and external experience. SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT —— FOR ALL OF YOU, MEN AND WOMEN – YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!! INSIDE AND OUT!!! I am not just talking about external beauty, but that aside, your soul – your essence and who you are IS AMAZING, no matter what shape your ‘shell’ may take. Your dreams, your fears, the things you’re passionate about, your smile, your giggles, the books you like to read, your ideas, just … YOU. YOU are beautiful!
To hear this beautiful women saying how they aren’t attractive and worried what society would think (after having JUST given birth – like literally!), and how they are scared to go outside because they don’t like the size of their thighs, I was saddened because instead of focusing on the beautiful little bundle they now have and the sheer amazement of having given birth and what she has gone through (and the pressure that brings in itself!), she was adding additional pressure on herself to bounce back into the ‘bikini body’ because she was worried someone would think she is fat! Who gives a crap what society thinks is what I would like to say!! Where the hell have we lost sight of what really matters and totally given up on ourselves so easily? How do we just completely get to the stage where we write ourselves off because a dress that fit us when we were 17 no longer fits us when we’re 30? Or the jumper we fit into last winter is a little tight now and we automatically regard ourselves as worthless?
Does it REALLY matter if your thighs touch? Your belly may be a bit soft? or your arms may have a bit of a jiggle? Does it really matter if you have a funny laugh, your hair doesn’t always sit straight and one of your toes is longer than the other? Don’t get me wrong, I have my days when I look in the mirror and think ‘mmmmmmmm’ BUT, my challenge to myself and all of you is to rise above that negative, shitty voice that is trying to dictate to you that you should look like everyone else and just fit in. stuff that! You were born for a reason and if there was no reason for you being here then you simply would not have been born … you are UNIQUE and FABULOUS and you were MADE TO STAND OUT – SO SHINE BRIGHT!!! GIRLS AND GUYS – YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL and it is your birthright, to be your own kind of beautiful and defining what that means for you. We’ve got to stop allowing these companies, who do so little for us, take up so much space in our heads and dictate what they define as beauty and then attempt to hold us accountable to an imagine of a model that 99.9% of the time has been photoshopped and the models don’t even look like themselves anyway! These companies (a lot of them anyway!), are all for the bottom line – the DOLLAR FIGURE, and don’t really give a crap about the individual, and I personally believe it is our time, and this stage in the evolutionary process of our individual consciousness and the collective consciousness, to start embracing ourselves and one another and not focusing on what everyone wears, how their hair looks and what size clothes they may or may not fit into. You weight, size, etc does not define your worth and we need to start lifting each other up, instead of pulling each other down but that first comes with our own self. People who truly love you, don’t care what you look like as they just want to have you in their life, and if someone does care how you look on their arm and treats you like an accessory, then do yourself a favour and get outta there! So long as you are healthy, and happy, then that is all that matters and it is your birthright to define what that is for you! Define yourself, define your own beauty and wear it with pride. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. xx